Pastor's wife relocates after-service women's intimacy group away from church sanctuary

A discreet weekly gathering held inside a church sanctuary, where Christian women sought to address feelings of emotional exhaustion and dissatisfaction in their marriages, will no longer be hosted on church grounds. Candy, the pastor's wife who quietly ran the meetings without her husband's knowledge, has concluded that the sanctuary is the wrong setting for that kind of work.

She also announced that she is stepping away from her responsibilities at the church, saying she now feels drawn to assist women in ways she believes the institution is not equipped to offer. "This isn't me rejecting the church," she told THE WEEKEND STAR. "I'm just simply recognising and acknowledging that this particular work requires a different environment."

For roughly five years, Candy has organised the private group for women who described their marriages, or their lives in general, as lacking passion. Following Sunday services each week, she and about 25 women would meet in the sanctuary, where men recruited for the purpose were brought in to provide intimate services. Since this newspaper first reported on the group's activities, several of the women have stopped showing up.

Candy said the experience has taught her that boundaries matter more than she previously appreciated. "Going forward, there would be clear guidelines about what the space is and what it is not," she said. "Since coming forward I have lost a couple participants, and it really made me reflect on all this. I have to create a controlled, respectful environment where people can actually process what they're dealing with."

The revelation prompted heated discussion. Some clergy denounced the meetings as wholly inappropriate, while others suggested the situation had drawn attention to a deeper, long-ignored conversation about intimacy and contentment within Christian marriages.

For Candy, the public response has only confirmed her view that the underlying issues are more serious than many wish to acknowledge. "I understand why people reacted the way they did," she said. "From the outside, it's easy to reduce it to something sensational. But that's not the full picture. Sometimes what looks wrong on the surface is really a response to something that has been ignored for too long."

She acknowledged that the controversy has prompted her to examine her own standing in the church, and whether her shifting outlook can sit comfortably alongside its teachings. "The Church has structure and doctrine, and I respect that," she said. "But I'm also realising that there are lived experiences that don't always fit neatly into those structures, and the reality is, the Church is not always the easiest place to have these conversations."

Candy maintains that the need which gave rise to the group has not gone away simply because the meetings have. "You can stop a space, but you can't switch off what people are experiencing internally," she said.

Her plan, she explained, is to build a structured, support-driven platform where women can speak frankly about marital and relationship struggles, including intimacy concerns and emotional distance. "My intentions haven't changed," she insisted. "What's changing is the environment and how it's being carried out."

She was firm in separating the new venture from anything church-related. "Church members are adults with real-life experiences and real relationship issues like everyone else," Candy said. "If someone from the church chooses to attend or participate, that would be their personal decision. But it would no longer be connected to church activities, church leadership or the church environment in any way."